Lo-Fidelity: Aspen’s dirty little secret

As a direct consequence of low-snow, the town’s much mellower this winter. And here’s Aspen’s dirty little secret: Some people are digging it. 

Across the board, folks I’ve talked to are viewing the dry year and dip in tourism as a welcome respite from the madness of a typical busy winter. In a sick, twisted, borderline selfish way, I’m really liking this winter. In the throes of a crippling drought and what’s widely considered crap skiing, schlepps like me in various sectors of the service industry are enjoying the unseasonably warm winter and the accompanying by-products. 

The sounds of studded snow tires gnashing against dry pavement. Thoughts turned to gardening. Blinding sun, a dearth of frost-covered windshields in the mornings, and a warm wind blowing dust and dead leaves around in February. Business is noticeably down. Less traffic. More parking spaces. Uncrowded slopes. Better service. Brief moments of stillness.

I overheard a tourist say they had Aspen Highlands “all to themselves.” These are the hallmarks of this year’s “cursed” ski season. 

My business is down. Way down. But don’t cry for me, Argentina — I’m perfectly fine with the lull. I’ve given the best years of my life to the ski and tourism industries. I’d rather do less business — and do it better — than be slammed all the time and spiraling mentally as a result. Being that busy is bad for your health and the collective consciousness of town. A little “reprieve” is more than welcome. Besides, when you grow up in a town where there are wild swings of business and two perennial off-seasons, you’re internally programmed and pre-conditioned to weather these dry spells, like a squirrel that’s squirrelled-away a stash of pinecones. 

I drive a lot. Like 10,000 miles between Aspen and Snowmass from Thanksgiving to Easter every year for the past three decades. Big snow = traffic horror shows and total nightmare scenarios. This year, the roads (but not the drivers) have been borderline navigable as a result of not constantly being covered with snow and ice. Those days on-end where stalactites of ice form on the Castle Creek bridge and rattle your teeth loose have been few and far between. There are no glacial ice-ruts to be found in the usual places either. I bet accidents are down, too. Works for me. 

Have you ever seen a snow shovel so lonely? Every sunny day, my quiver of snow removal tools looks longingly at the sky. I even unplugged my heat tapes a couple of weeks ago. I think they’ve been on a total of 10 days so far this winter, and my lower electric bill is proof. With all the money I’ve saved on carwashes this winter alone, I could buy myself a sit-down tomahawk rib-eye-for-two dinner in town. Dare me. 

You want to see an ugly sight that is the real barometer of our winter? Take a peek at the city snow dump pile across from the airport. It looks like I feel right now. 

I imagine some businesses will get spun-out of town at the end of this winter. I truly want to see businesses succeed, and it’s sad to see the turnover; but sometimes, I have a hard time feeling sympathy for entities who view Aspen solely as their goose that lays golden eggs. Call me callous, but Aspen doesn’t owe anyone anything. She gives far more than she takes.

And what about ski conditions? I’ve never heard so much bellyaching in my life. Every time I hear someone complain about ski conditions, I think to myself, They haven’t been skiing where I have. I’ve been hitting my haunts regularly on Ajax, Tiehack, and Snowmass. Come skiing with me. I’ll show you a real good line. No bad ski conditions, only bad skiers. 

You hear a lot of talk in Aspen about drought, global warming, impending fire danger, and gloom and doom about the future of the ski industry — at least, I do anyways. If you think drought will continue here, you’re sadly mistaken. Same for the dip in tourism. 

You watch: Both winter and tourism will come raging back with the fury and vengeance of a lover scorned. Then, before you know it, people will be complaining about how sick they are of all the snow. And cold. And tourists. They’ll be yearning for a reboot of the relaxing winter of 2025-26. 

Take the rest while you can, and count your blessings. All things considered, we’re doing pretty darned well. The jetstream will shift. There’s still more winter to come. I promise.

Contact Lorenzo via email at suityourself@sopris.net.