Meredith C. Carroll: 2020 Yelp Reviews

Meredith C. Carroll
Muck Off

* — Very bad, I do not recommend. Would have given zero stars but it wasn’t an option.

* — It broke almost immediately. Customer service has been atrocious. Still haven’t gotten a refund.

** — I was barely there for an hour before the diarrhea started and wouldn’t stop. Gave it two stars though because I ended up reaching my goal weight.

***** — I came for the impeachment and stayed to see Trump lose the election, which yielded more than 50 bonus losses in the past six weeks. Can’t recommend highly enough.

* — We debated giving two stars but then realized there was a whole extra day this year. Totally over-the-top, unnecessary and even a little cruel. Have a heart. Read the room.

* — It was way too long. I’m def not paying for all of this. The supervisor was also very rude and incompetent.

** — It was like being in an escape room where the staff got high, went home, lost the keys and then forgot they had a job. It was mildly thrilling for the first bit but got old really fast.

* — Ordered a case of Corona and got COVID instead. Still never got the beer.

***** — Hello, we are offering a part time work from home offer with attractive weekly salary, do get to me for more details if you have interest. 30 mins is enough for each day job and it can be completed anytime from 6pm. KINDLY EMAIL BACK WITH YOUR ALTERNATIVE EMAIL.THANKS.

** — Too many snacks, not enough actual meals.

*** — Highly recommend if “feeling alive” isn’t on your list of priorities.

*****— I’m here for the comments.

** — Horrible and expensive. It never worked correctly, not once. Gave it two stars because I found a bag of unwrapped Halloween candy when I was looking for tools in my storage unit.

* — TOTAL SCAM. Can’t believe I fell for it.

* — There were just so many days. They kept coming, one right after the next.

*** — Stopped working after one week. Tried powering off/on and drying it in a bowl of rice but nothing worked. Gave it three stars because I tripped crossing the street and it broke my fall. Also, it fit perfectly in the dumpster.

***** — My sweatpants collection has never been more robust.

* — It went on and on and wouldn’t end. Once I thought it had finally stopped but it turns out my organs had shut down after 17 cans of White Claw and a 52-hour “Ozark” marathon.

*** — There were way too many hours in each day, except for that one when the black fly declared squatters’ rights on Mike Pence’s head. I wish that one could have lasted longer.

** — What was up with the toilet paper? That was really weird.

* — No matter how many times I asked it to put on a mask and maintain a 6-foot distance, it refused and kept coming closer. Made me incredibly uncomfortable and ruined the entire thing.

[edit] Now it looks like it’s trying to creep into 2021. Can someone please alert the authorities.

More at and on Twitter @MCCarroll.