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Lum: Get ready, get set, go

Su Lum
Slumming

Whenever I’m about to embark on a journey of some kind — a trip or a cruise, for instance — I find myself triple-cleaning the house and crossing things off my to-do list as if I were going to be gone for more than a year rather than less than a week.

I am only going to be in Denver for a few days getting nasal bypass surgery that will deliver oxygen directly into my windpipe. When you next see me, you won’t be able to tell from my face that anything is wrong with me — what a concept.

My daughters Skye and Hillery will be my nursemaids. We will be staying in a two-bedroom suite with a kitchen, accessible to all the medical places and lots of good restaurants. My friend Hilary, trouper that she is, will be staying at the house with the dogs.

I used to tell my granddaughter Riley that she was a real t-r-o-o-p-e-r. The first spelling lesson I ever gave and I got it wrong.

On Monday, I met Dr. McDonald, my surgeon, and Tuesday the deed should be done.

I am only going to be “out” for 20 minutes and will only have to stay overnight, but we’re not sure how long we will have to hang around for aftercare.

One thing I am sure about is that I won’t be able to bring you a timely report in this column because my deadline is 11 a.m. Tuesday and is/was exactly when the scalpel has cut my throat, and as you read this the deed has, I hope, already been done.

This will give me a week to assess my situation and collect my thoughts, but it goes against my grain, just as it does when I have to write a fluff column on a Monday night when my mind is entirely on Tuesday election returns.

Oh, well. You’re probably not (har) holding your breath.

Meanwhile, I’m making lists and checking them off. If I don’t get a grip on myself, I’ll start digging into this year’s tax-return papers.

I did do a huge clean of my desk and kitchen table, which accumulate piles of scraps of paper, bills, articles I want to save and old grocery lists. I paid the bills with my online bank account (which I totally adore), tossed out everything unnecessary and sorted through everything pertaining to the upcoming adventure such as vital phone numbers on the back of the gas bill and copies of the zillion forms I had to fill out for Dr. Schwartz, Dr. McDonald’s office and Rose Medical where I had a phone interview with an amiable nurse named Rose.

I organized all this information in a navy blue folder, which I pray I will not leave behind when I leave Monday morning at dawn, the way I left my passport for my penultimate cruise, one of the worst days of my life in the stupidity and guilt department.

There are few things more heart-dropping than hearing, “Passport?” and knowing that it is hanging on the back of a chair at the kitchen table in the purse you decided not to take.

Of course there are worse things, but it was a moment.

Su Lum is a longtime local on her way to Oz. Her column appears every Wednesday in The Aspen Times. Reach her at su@rof.net.


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