Even a moose can solve Aspen’s traffic problem
Hey, Mayor Steve Skadron. It’s me, Bullwinkle. Yeah, me — everyone’s favorite moose.
I ran through your town last week on my way to North Star to take a swim and see my girlfriend. And boy, what a mess it was on Highway 82. Potholes at the S-curves, traffic, auto emissions, ticked-off workers and drivers pointing middle fingers at each other.
What’s all that about? Why is your traffic backed up all the way to Owl Creek?
I thought to myself, “Hmm, 82 is no way for a moose to travel through town; there has to be a better way.” And there was. I crossed the pedestrian bridge, grazed my way through the Marolt and found myself in town in no time, next to the friendliest peace officers ever. (I even smiled for them when they took my picture.)
So, Mr. Mayor, while I may be just a lowly bull moose, I know enough to know it’s time for Aspen to fix its traffic problem. And as the mayor, the buck stops with you. You and City Council need to get moving on it. And get your traffic moving. Those cars aren’t going away. Common sense tells me that. There are more and more. Even a moose can figure out a better way to get in and out of Aspen.
Bullwinkle (aka Beverle Ostrofsky)
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