Letter: The ‘fun’ in funicular | AspenTimes.com

Letter: The ‘fun’ in funicular

“Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung” — true words quoted from Voltaire. With that being said, I will spew my stupidity across this fish wrap. You can hum a tune if you like.

I must throw my opinion into the debate of the Lift One development. I will not go into the design per se, but I will say that they should put a bar at the bottom of the Norway run.

Can you imagine watching some affluent skier trash his $12,000 skis on Norway or watching your friend going head first off the center rock. Watching all of this over my “flaming bitch-slap against the wall” drink that cost me $29.95. What fun.

Speaking of fun, what we need at the bottom of the hill to get us up to the new “Lift One-B” is a funicular. I mean it’s just fun to say ”funicular”; it even has the “fun” in the name. Seriously, a funicular can move people and freight up the hill. The funicular could use the old Lift One corridor, and it would be great for the ski races. I encourage everyone to check out http://www.mnn.com/lifestyle/eco-tourism/stories/14-fabulous-funiculars-from-around-the-globe.

Yes, I’m sure the designers of the project are rolling their collective eyes, the no-change merchants are howling for my head and Aspen Skiing Co. has just revoked my pass, but why not? I’ve seen some really cool ones, and they are oh so much fun to ride. Did I say “fun” again?

I believe that everyone involved in this project must think a little outside the box. Aspen Street is a bobsled run in winter, and the best parking is at the bottom of that street. What about freight? Are the designers of the hotel really expecting to get freight up that hill with icy pavement? A funicular can be designed to accommodate both functions.

So there it is, my stupendously stupid idea. Now let’s see if someone runs with it.

James H. Perry


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