Leona Helmsley reincarnated | AspenTimes.com

Leona Helmsley reincarnated

Leona Helmsley has returned to life and lives in Aspen. A few readers may recall that Helmsley once told her maid “only the little people pay taxes.”

In Aspen apparently the “little people” should not own cars. After all, the cars contribute to global warming. A commentary published Sunday in the Times by a clone of Helmsley condemned the designers of the Lumberyard affordable housing project for ensuring parking for 1.4 cars per unit. (“Flouting Aspen’s climate goals at the Lumberyard,” commentary by Elizabeth Milias, March 20, The Aspen Times)

Helmsley’s clone extols the connection with nature in the community. Unsaid, but implied, is the suggestion that “the little people” can walk or take public transportation. This will mean that the residents of the Lumberyard will need to walk or take public transportation to the stores in Aspen to buy groceries and necessities, assuming that Mark Hunt has not forced the closure of the facilities that serve the “little people.”

Otherwise, the “little people” will be forced to take a Roaring Fork Transportation Authority bus downvalley to shop at more reasonably priced markets. Thus, that should not be a problem because the “little people” have plenty of time on their hands.

Helmsley’s clone fails to note that the real damage to Aspen’s environment and the global commons come from the “other people” living in Aspen who drive large SUVs and fly on private jets. Perhaps the greatest incongruity is found with the Crown family, owners of Aspen Skiing Co. While Skico has adopted admirable green coals, the Crowns’ other company produces Gulfstream aircraft, a major contributor to global warming. The “other people” living in Aspen are big users of this later product.

Philip Verleger