Disclosures and disclaimers for Aspen voters

Maurice Emmer’s recent letter “Aspen Mayoral hopefuls so far a dud” (Commentary, The Aspen Times, Feb. 7) has prompted me to consider throwing my own hat into the ring. But before officially declaring, there are a few matters I wish to be proactive about.

First, there are undoubtedly records showing that I was once a cis-gendered Boy Scout. And an altar boy. Moreover, there is abundant photographic evidence that I misrepresented myself as a Native American, by means of a makeshift headdress and bow-and-arrow ensemble. Inexplicably, at the same time I also was mimicking the genocidal ways of Hop-along Cassidy.

I am even more embarrassed by holding degrees in the literature of Western Civilization, without having once attempted to deconstruct all the inherent evils in my ancestral past that this literature reveals.

All I can say by way of apology is that these things do not represent who I am now.

Finally, it will quickly be pointed out that I am not now, nor ever have been, a citizen of Aspen, but I know that Aspen’s enlightened electorate will surely not hold that against me.

Chad Klinger