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The heartbreak of being involved

Alison Berkley

The problem with living in a dream world is youre bound to wake up sooner or later.So maybe my expectations are a little high. Ive been hoping and praying for stuff like a huge book or movie deal, losing that last 5 pounds, instilling some sort of sanity in my crazy dog and finding a guy who doesnt fit the whole odds are good but the goods are odd theory about the selection of single men in Aspen.I was also hoping that maybe one day wed have a Democrat in the White House.My friend Sarah gave me the impression that maybe we could do something about that. Shes one of those passionate do-gooder people who cares about stuff like children and animals and the environment you know, those causes I always assumed people like her would take care of.She weighs like 90 pounds because she burns calories in her sleep worrying about making the world a better place while Im on the treadmill running like a hamster on one of those wheel things so I can fit into my size 4 chocolate-brown leather pants before New Years. Despite my efforts, Im still way heavier than 90 pounds and Miss Must Save The World who has no time to workout is a size 0.Sarahs all invested and hard working and focused and running around like a chicken with her head cut off, car full of art supplies and childrens books and her two dogs and like 6,000 campaign signs and bumper stickers that say stuff like, When Women Vote Democrats Win and Bush Family Values with bombs on it. Her blue eyes blaze with such intensity that Im just waiting for beams of light to shoot out of them as she levitates above the earth from the sheer force of her passion and will. She has great hair too, long and blond and straight. Ive been jealous of her hair since high school because its way longer than mine and she doesnt have to spend an hour blow-drying it to make it look like that.The whole election thing was a super big deal to Sarah, who took it upon herself to personally make sure everyone in the great state of Colorado voted for our friend John Kerry. The guy had my vote from go. Hes a snowboarder, hellllooo! Thats almost as cool as Clinton and his whole saxophone-playing intern-seducing ways. What a stud! God, I really miss him and that sweet, buttery Arkansas accent and the cute little dimple on the end of his nose.I told Sarah that I would do my part and show up at the polls and support him with my vote, but noooooo. That wasnt good enough. She wanted me to tag along with her little Kerry Van last Saturday.So I got up at 8 a.m. and met up with this whole crew of gung-ho activist types who were way too awake and cheery for me at that hour. I pretended to be excited as I covered my car with Kerry Snowboards stickers and signs. I attached an American flag to my antenna with duct tape. I even wore the feather boa Sarah brought for me, though I actually kind of liked that part. I kept thinking how nice I am to do this for my friend, because I know how much it means to her. God knows Id rather be tucked into my Frette linens dreaming about lying on some beach in the South of France while the bellboy from the hotel rubs suntan lotion on my not important presidential election important.But as we made our way downvalley, more cars joined in and soon there was a huge procession of us with our flags waving and signs flying and cars decorated and horns blaring like a little Second of November Liberal Parade. We honked and drove real slow, doing laps around supermarket parking lots and the Glenwood Mall and Main Street in downtown Rifle (needless to say there is no Gucci store located there), dodging angry Republicans along the way (Ten points for the guy in the Chevy pickup with the gun rack!). We saw people picketing the streets, carrying Kerry signs and giving us thumbs up and peace signs as we drove by. I fancied myself a modern-day hippie and imagined what the whole experience would feel like on LSD, saying stuff like far out, man and make love, not war and really meaning it while I danced barefoot in the snow.My small effort ended that day. But Sarah worked every waking hour until the polls closed on Election Day. She canvassed and organized and answered phones and made signs and showed some Kerry movie and organized parties and hung out at Mick Irelands house and did everything in her power to get people involved. You would have thought she was running for office herself. I actually suggested it, wondering what she will do once the election is over and she has time to like, kick back and relax a bit.When I woke up this morning and found out we have another four years of Bush and that horrible Texas accent and the moronic speeches and the tiny head and thin lips and the big ears and the god-bless-this and god-bless-that, I couldnt help but feel that same slap in the face that comes every time I wake up from another fantasy and realize the world is nothing like what I want it to be (cue Princess temper tantrum).Even though things didnt turn out the way we wanted them to, I dont think Sarahs hard work and selfless devotion were for naught. Maybe the best things in life really are worth the wait all we can do is hope for better in 2008.The Princess is exhausted from all this caring about stuff and does not want to be disturbed. Send only really nice e-mails to alison@berkleymedia.com


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