Key strokes from morning poems
Every morning I feed a piece of blank paper into my Wedgefield 200 manual typewriter.
I type the date, I confidently slide the carriage to the right and I begin typing whatever is there to be typed. No stopping – no going back.
I call them “Morning Poems,” because I’m obviously not overburdened by a need for a more clever name. I don’t know all that much about poetry, but I know that I love the click-clack sound of my typewriter, so every morning I use “poetry” as an excuse to indulge myself.
I suppose I could get just as much aural satisfaction from clanking around in the silverware drawer for a few minutes every day, but that would be unfair to you, the poetry lover.
—–
1/14/00
I am the God of Distraction
I can make anything happen to prevent your creative work
I Am All Powerful, Fear Me
For I make the phone ring, the door knock, the wife beckon
Tremble before my might, Shudder at my lunch bell
Bow down before my fearsome power to fill your bladder
That need for a snack, that’s me
Than swiveling of the neck between sentences …
Some of my finest work yet
You shall learn My Name well
And be forced to doodle it endlessly
I am the God of Distraction
Bow before me, then go make yourself some lunch
1/7/00
There is a Zen saying that goes something like:
“Whatever you need next is within reach of where you now sit.”
As I sit here, I can reach my cup of tea, the toenail clippers, a roll of toilet paper, a stack of papers to be filed
A book of restaurant matches, a letter opener
The computer mouse (but the “on” button is too far, unless I use my toe)
A small dictionary, a harmonica, a book on how to play slide guitar
A mechanical pencil, 5 floppy disks and almost
Almost – if I scoot my chair forward – the phone
Of course, scooting the chair gives the concept whole new meanings
Had the Zen masters of old had rolling office chairs
How much different would their teachings have been?
Substantially, I think
Especially if their chairs provided the awesome lumbar support that mine does
9/20/99
Yesterday was brimming with potential
I could have changed the world with just
A few well-placed phone calls
Could have righted wrongs
Done a turn for the greater good
But instead I masturbated three or four times
I honestly lost count
Still, it was a good day
3/12/00
So what if I’m driven by Fear?
Everyone needs a chauffeur, and Fear is a great one
He picks me up at seven a.m. every morning and reminds me
Of what I didn’t accomplish the day before
He has a well-stocked bar in the back of the Fearmobile
He swerves through traffic like a madman, afraid of nothing
And when he gets pulled over he gives it right back to the cop
Nothing ever gets done, of course, unless you count
The gradual decay of stomach lining
But it sure beats doing all the driving yourself
2/6/00
My idea was to merely write “Nothing” on the page and be done with it
It would be so arty and deep
It would be so something-ist, maybe an artistic “ist”
That hasn’t been done yet
But away I go, how can I stop now?
Maybe tomorrow I will write a clever one-word poem
That will sum it all up
But for today I’m stumped, I’m totally full of words
2/5/00
FLOYD’S AFFIRMATIONS
I, Floyd, am a competent and well-paid plumber
I, Floyd, am a sought after and oft-referred plumber
I, Floyd, am a passionate, dedicated plumber
I, Floyd, am a loyal Elk
I, Floyd, am a clear vessel for more plumbing jobs
I, Floyd, am a patient and supportive father
I, Floyd, am a calm and reliable problem solver
I, Floyd, am the best plumber in the Universe
I, Floyd, am available for the best plumbing gigs in the state, world
I, Floyd, am a competent and well-paid plumber

Support Local Journalism

Support Local Journalism
Readers around Aspen and Snowmass Village make the Aspen Times’ work possible. Your financial contribution supports our efforts to deliver quality, locally relevant journalism.
Now more than ever, your support is critical to help us keep our community informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having locally. Every contribution, however large or small, will make a difference.
Each donation will be used exclusively for the development and creation of increased news coverage.
Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.
User Legend: Moderator
Trusted User
Roger Marolt: Mostly guessing about wildfires
Columnist Roger Marolt is learning to hold his breath longer during these hot, dry summers, he writes.