Addison Gardner: Always Right | AspenTimes.com

Addison Gardner: Always Right

Last Thursday, I wrote the definitive column on health care, and it was full of facts and figures. It refuted every teleprompter teradiddle in President Obama’s speech.

My arguments were airtight and submersible to 500 fathoms, but you won’t get to read them, because Friday morning I installed Apple’s latest system software on my Mac (“Snow Leopard”), and the big cat ate my notes, my word processor and my will to start from scratch.

I e-mailed my editors, Sunday, detailing my tragedy: Life happens, I explained. Dogs do eat homework. My e-mail had a kind of “OnStar,” smoking radiator, pinned to my seat by my steering-column desperation.

I was off the hook, and you were spared 700 words that would’ve put any accountant into a deep coma.

So, it’s now 4:30 a.m. Monday, and I’m sitting in front of my wife’s Dell computer, and I’m shooting from the hip. Maybe Joe Wilson’s “You Lie!” approach is more effective than citing the Congressional Budget Office or playing infield “pepper” with terms like “trillions.”

This column is short on facts, long on guilt, and delivered with a sputter, but it has the virtue of being better than Maureen Dowd’s latest offering, and that New York Times’ columnist has several full-time research assistants.

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Dowd’s Saturday column dismissed Congressman Wilson’s passionate outburst (“You Lie!”) with compelling “post-racial” persuasiveness: “Some people just can’t believe a black man is president and will never accept it.”

Whenever a South Carolinian questions the president’s truthfulness, it’s time for liberal columnists to evoke tree limbs festooned with Spanish moss and dangling black corpses; it’s time for flickering torches, white hoods and battle flags.

Heck, you don’t have to be from the South to be branded a racist: Just point out that Obama’s no-calorie, seven-layer chocolate cake is a fantasy, and your Klan membership is assured.

When Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid called President Bush “a liar” and “a loser,” Democrats had nothing to say. Congressman Joe Wilson has apologized, repeatedly, for his outburst Wednesday night: Sen. Reid refuses to recant his words, and Maureen Dowd is OK with that.

Democrat Congressional leadership has demanded a House Ethics Committee “investigation.” They want Joe Wilson to be “censured,” but they’ve got terrorist-fighting CIA agents to crucify, first, so Joe will probably get a reprieve.

Joe Wilson is now enshrined alongside “Joe the Plumber” in the hearts of many red state Americans. His has become the cry released in millions of aching American throats: The emancipating shout of inarticulate, intemperate defiance. An in-your-face “No!” of protest. A slap-down of the president’s perfect tailoring, perfect elocution, and impeccably couched Ivy League lies.

Ben Smith of “Politico” reported that 18,859 contributors had mailed in small checks totaling over $1 million by Friday night. Joe Wilson’s fundraising has surpassed that of his Democrat rival, Rob Miller, for the first time.

“You lie!” became the rallying cry of an estimated 200,000 to 300,000-plus Americans who joined the Taxpayer March on Washington Sept. 12. The Park Police no longer provide estimates of crowd size, but the entire 2-mile length of The Mall was packed, and the crowd filled the Capital west lawn and overflowed into another swelling demonstration staged to the west, on Fourth Street.

Not a bad showing, considering the hand-lettered character of the demonstrations – no match for the professional, bussed-in protesters of the UAW, the NAACP, and lacking the organizational panache of a MoveOn.org or SEIU.

CNN took time out from its breathless reporting of a “terrorist attack on the Potomac River,” (routine Coast Guard exercise) to dismiss the demonstrators as “tens of thousands” of “conservatives,” and “angry Republicans.”

On Inauguration Day, CNN described as “Americans” the swelling crowds that gathered on The Mall to celebrate Obama’s “historic moment” in history; funny how those same “Americans” morphed quickly into “angry Republicans” when taxpayers closed their shops and traveled to Washington to make their voices heard.

Forget about the numbers being bantered about, and apply your common sense. Do you believe the president when he tells you that the Democrat health care bill “won’t cover illegals,” when Democrats have blocked every Republican effort to require verifiable identification? Why have Democrats thwarted Republican attempts to explicitly prohibit the funding of abortions, if “it’s not true” that abortion funding is allowed in Democrat bills?

Why has the Democrat Congress blocked every Republican effort to mandate Congressional participation in the “public option” that Pelosi and Harry Reid cobble together? If the Democrats’ health care plan is good enough for private-sector Americans, why isn’t it good enough for Congress?

Finally, do you believe the president when he tells you, “I will not sign health insurance reform that adds even one dime to our deficit over the next decade.”

If you don’t buy this malarkey, it’s time to risk being branded “a racist” and make your voice heard.

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