What are we in for? | AspenTimes.com

What are we in for?

Dear Editor:

Michelle said, “For the first time in my adult life, I’m proud of my country … we’ve learned that when the bar is set sometimes it moves on you … right when you get there … it MOVES . ..In America in 2008, life is not good: we’re a divided country, we’re a country that is ‘just downright mean,’ we are ‘guided by fear, we’re a nation of cynics …'”

Now that she’s Mrs. President, is she finally proud of her country? Was the bar set low enough? Is there anything else we can do to make her happy? Was it the downright meanness and cynicism that got them there or was it hatred of Bush, white liberal guilt and racism?

Martin Luther King Jr. said, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.” Dr. King, along with our Founding Fathers, must be spinning in his grave right about now.

Barry said, “We can’t, uh, drive our SUVs and, y’know, eat as much as we want and keep our homes on, s’y’know, 72 degrees at all times …” So he’s going to trade the armor-plated Lincoln for a Prius, and the Secret Service’s Suburbans for Smart cars? Michelle’s going to stock the White House pantry from Costco, and they’re going to wear sweaters and set the White House thermostat to 68 degrees this winter?

He also said, “I intend to go through every line of the federal budget and make sure that, number one, our money is being spent wisely, number two, that we aggressively go after waste, fraud and corruption, and number three, that we are using every dollar efficiently as possible.” I believe the federal budget is about a billion lines. Can he really read the whole thing in four years, run the country and keep Michelle happy?

I hope there’s a teleprompter by the phone for that 3 a.m. call or it’s going to be a bunch of “uh, y’know, uh, beegadee, beegadee, that’s all folks.”

Neal Pollack


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