Old versus young on the ice
With all the ruckus in the paper lately (especially in this particular section) I, too, would like to weigh in and add my opinion about whether or not we should feed the bears or just impeach George Bush and put a bear in his place, the expansion of paid parking along Highway 82 to the AABC (oh, wait, that’s the traffic issue, sorry), and, of course, whether we should send more bears to Iraq. However, I have a MUCH more important issue to address that I hope all readers of this paper will take to heart. Specifically, I would like to unequivocally state that THE CURRENT ASPEN MOTHER PUCKERS ARE NOT WEENIES!
A challenge has been put forth by the retired Mother Puckers, the gist of which is that we are a bunch of young whipper-snappers who don’t know a whit about hockey. (I used a lot of old-fashioned words so the hockey retirees would understand. I’m sure your readers know how cranky old people can get when you try to use modern language.) We current Mother Puckers simply CANNOT let such a challenge go unanswered.
So come Oct. 20 we’ll be there at the Aspen Ice Garden ready to take them down! And we would like as many people as possible to come and witness their pain as we skate circles around those retirees. Sure, the game will benefit Tom’s Door, a great valley program that helps the homeless, but more importantly, it will prove to everyone in Aspen that even though these retired Mother Puckers have probably played hockey since the Stone Age (and are probably still using the same equipment ” phew!) we current Mother Puckers ROCK!
We’ll see you on the ice Oct. 20. Oh, and you retirees, you don’t have to use a rock to sharpen your skates anymore. Nowadays, we use a machine called a “skate sharpener.” It’s run with something called “electricity.” You may have heard of it …