My dad needs permission to travel | AspenTimes.com
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My dad needs permission to travel

Dear Editor:

My 82-year-old, retired father is contemplating a vacation soon, and it is apparent that I need Paul Andersen’s permission for him to fly to Aspen. I will not permit him to walk or ride a mountain bike (I know a mountain bike is a permitted human activity, as Paul was positively gleeful in describing how much fun he had scarring the earth with his knobby-treaded mountain bike on trails created solely for humans) ” in fact, I insist my Dad, horrors, ride in an airplane all the way to Aspen!

Holier-than-thou types like Paul have determined that no one may make the choice to travel in retirement, but rather they should stay put and “honestly face the future” by creating personal happiness in pursuit of wisdom. No visiting family if that involves the use of carbon. No travel to gaze on the beauty of this planet and gain inspiration in seeking wisdom ” that is just so utterly selfish. No unworthy legacy from human inhabitation in all aspects of our existence on the planet, according to Paul. I suspect his solution for my father is for him to die. That way his disgraceful life as a human impacting Mother Earth will be over.

Since I must clear all travel with Paul, I went to your website, expecting to find an application where I can seek Herr Andersen’s permission to spend some of my father’s retirement largess -” but I couldn’t find the application form!

Please tell me how I can apply for permission for my father to do what he wants to do instead of living his life the way Paul demands he live it ” I don’t want to offend the all-wise, all-knowing master of the universe if I can avoid it. We unworthy types are all about doing what he wants us to.

R. Barry Crook

Aspen


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