River Bridge works to protect children and support families

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month — a time to shed light on a difficult but vital topic. While the issue is serious, those working to prevent abuse and support affected families in the Roaring Fork Valley bring compassion, expertise and resilience to their roles.

Mary Cloud, development director, and Amy Gomez, mental health provider and prevention coordinator at River Bridge Regional Center, are two of those people.

“River Bridge is a non-profit, child advocacy center,” Cloud said. “We provide support to child abuse victims in four counties: Eagle, Garfield, Rio Blanco and Pitkin. We work with law enforcement and human services to help their investigations of child abuse, but in a more neutral, child-friendly, comfortable setting for the child and non-offending family members.”

The River Bridge Regional Center provides forensic interviews that can be upheld in a court of law, Cloud said, providing family advocacy, mental health therapy, assessments, medical care, and community outreach for child abuse. 

“We help the community learn about child abuse,” Cloud said. “To learn what the signs are and certainly how to report any instances of child abuse or concerns about a child.”

Inside Gomez’s office — a space filled with toys, a couch, colored pencils and a painting of a bear — children find comfort and safety. 

“I’ve always been drawn to this kind of work,” Gomez said. “In high school, I interned with child welfare at an afterschool program, and I don’t know what it was specifically, but I fell in love with it. It’s horrible to say because it’s such a heavy topic, but someone has to do it, someone needs to be there and help, support these families that are going through something very traumatic.”

Cloud, a former math teacher at Glenwood Springs Middle School, said she began recognizing signs of abuse in her students.

“When the kids are hungry or when they just can’t stay awake in class, or when they’re constantly absent on a Friday or a Monday,” Cloud said. “Those long weekends, they might be trafficked, they might have to travel with their family or somebody.”

Identifying trafficking can be especially difficult, Cloud added, because absences may also stem from a parent’s work schedule.

Gomez entered the field differently, with early exposure to child abuse cases and their impacts.

“You can’t turn it off,” Gomez said. “You’re doing the work and you’re seeing it almost daily, and so we do presentations on secondary trauma, because if you’re hearing or seeing constant stories of trauma, that can affect your mental health.”

She recalled examples of children crying uncontrollably or begging school staff not to inform their parents about something that happened — common signs of deeper issues.

“There’s often generational abuse,” Cloud explained. “If the parents say to their kid, ‘I’m going to smack you’, that was something that their parents did. So when we see kids that are coming from abusive situations, we’re also working with the parents on how to manage those behaviors so it doesn’t stay with them in their relationships.”

Gomez works with children and their parents to break these cycles.

“If we see a kid hitting others at school, it might be something they’re witnessing at home,” Gomez said. “So it’s also teaching the caregivers about different alternatives, different coping skills, let’s try those, and sometimes we’ll have a child teach their parents in a session, and they can practice it together.”

Understanding generational trauma is key, Gomez said.

“People say, ‘This is what my parents did and I turned out fine,'” she said. “So I ask them to list what worked and what didn’t. Recognizing the good and harmful parts of their upbringing helps.”

The goal, Gomez added, is to ensure children feel safe going to their caregivers if something traumatic happens.

“If that parent is freaking out, yelling, getting mad at them, the child is less likely to talk to them about things that have happened,” Gomez said. 

Some parents get angry at the situation or the fact that their child was in danger or went through a terrible experience, which is understandable, but the child doesn’t know that. 

Gomez said parents often respond with anger — not at the child, but at the situation — which can still deter children from speaking up.

“A lot of pushback we get is ‘they’re 3, they don’t need to know anything’, but body safety, keeping your hands to yourself, being a supportive caregiver, that’s giving them the education that your body is yours,” Gomez said. “It’s also teaching them consent, like who is allowed to touch your body.”

Consent in this context includes recognizing when someone doesn’t want a hug or when a child doesn’t want to be touched.

“As soon as toddlers are able to talk, it’s teaching them the right body part names and who can see or touch their body parts, like mommy and daddy can bathe you or the doctor might need to look at you,” Cloud said. “Knowing those body parts is really important at that age.”

While abusers are often portrayed as strangers in public places, most abuse comes from people the child knows.

“The child abuse that lasts for months or years is done by someone they know,” Cloud said. “If a child is abducted in a park and sexually abused, they’ll tell about it because it scared them. The children that are groomed for years by a family member or neighbor or someone who is a trusted family person because they’ve had access to them for years. This is about knowing who your child is spending their time with.”

Open communication and clear rules can reduce risk, she said.

“It’s like having a seatbelt in a car,” Gomez said. “You can’t prevent a car crash from ever happening to you, but the seatbelt can help keep you safe.”

Often, abusers groom the parents as well as the child, Gomez said.

“They’ll offer to cook dinner for you or take your child home from school, and it starts with very small things,” Gomez said. “The seatbelt is that you’ve had these conversations with your child and then believing them when they say that someone touched their vagina or their penis, and the next step is to say okay, we’re going to keep you safe.”

Children who’ve had these talks and whose abuse is addressed quickly tend to need less long-term support, Gomez added.

“Child abuse is not restricted to one race, one religion, socioeconomic status,” Cloud said. “Abuse can happen anywhere, even if it’s between children or an adult with a child. Always have those conversations.” 

While children themselves are not responsible for the prevention of their own abuse or safety, because it’s the duty of the caregivers and adults in their life, letting them know that there are dangers in the world in a healthy way can help keep them safe. 

“Sometimes we’ll see a child for abuse and a mother will disclose that she was abused as a child and it was never reported,” Cloud said. “We served 179 children last year and we know there are more children out there that are being impacted.”

The River Bridge Regional Center receives referrals from law enforcement and human services during cases and anyone can ask to be referred to the center if they feel they need it while the case is ongoing. 
To report abuse or neglect, call 1-800-264-5437. For more information on the River Bridge Regional Center, visit riverbridgerc.org/.