Hurry, Election Day
Is it Nov. 6 yet? As far as I’m concerned, this election can’t come soon enough. For starters, I am starting to feel sorry for Mitt Romney – someone please slap me. I am also riddled with anxiety over the fact that I am living in a state that is still toying with the idea of swinging a vote for the hapless GOP candidate. After Romney’s weeklong “gaffe-apalooza,” I am dumbstruck by the most recent Rasmussen Reports survey showing Romney claiming 47 percent (vs. 45 percent) of likely voters in Colorado.
I write this not to add to the ample supply of obstinate and divisive political rants but to honestly express my need to understand. I’m aware that there are those who simply identify themselves as Republicans. They are registered as such and vote accordingly. But what does it even mean anymore to be a Republican? I follow the political news closely, and in the past year, nearly every legislative action, proposal, promise and platitude that has emanated from the GOP has run the gamut of incorrect to insane to intensely myopic to pure bat-crap crazy. And these are not just empty partisan zingers. Really. Let’s review some of the highlights from the 2012 Republican campaign.
The president of the United States slipped past the CIA, the NSA, the FBI and the entire world with a fake birth certificate. Obama is a socialist, and he spent too much money bailing out Wall Street. All abortions should be accompanied by a government-mandated transvaginal ultrasound – and vaginas have superpowers that ward off rape sperm. Gay marriage will destroy my marriage faster than I can myself. Dead people in North Carolina are trying to steal the election and must be stopped. Half of America doesn’t pay taxes because they are parasitic losers (not because they don’t have any income). I’m not releasing my tax returns! But now I am – and I overpaid? Russia borders Alaska, and Cold War II is coming!
A snarky synopsis, perhaps, but it doesn’t stray far enough from the truth to be wholeheartedly dismissed. And it only reinforces my need to understand why anyone would want to vote for Romney on Nov. 6. I am respectfully reaching out for answers. (Answers such as supply-side economics, deficit reduction, jobs-jobs-jobs and God will not receive full credit.) Please help me understand.
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