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An imaginary job

Dear Editor:So I get up, put on ESPN on the old TV, make some Eggos and have some OJ and, like every other $30,000-a-year Joe, start a typical Thursday at my 9-5. Things go through my head like, “Man, I wish the Rockies weren’t nine games back,” or “I hope I made a good playlist on my iPod for the trip into Aspen.” My drive goes as well as it could, jammed out to some Motley Crüe “Kickstart My Heart”; thought it prudent to grab coffee at Zélé and pick up both Aspen papers. It is at this moment where things get unseemly.This is where my day turned into a (as an old hockey coach of mine used to say) cluster f—. I was officially pissed off. I am not talking about a “getting a parking ticket” pissed off – I am talking about a “watching the 10-point favorite Broncos lose to the ’49ers in DENVER on the last game of the season so they don’t go to the playoffs” pissed off! A type of pissed off where if there were a 9-iron within reach, things could get grim. Right there like a smack in the nose, you know, the kind of smack in the nose that pisses you off more than it hurts, type of smack, read the headline, “City hires global warming manager” (May 24). Hold the f—ing phone!There is no way our elected officials are going to actually pay someone $75,000 a year to manage something that IS NOT EVEN REAL. How do they come up with this s—? I ask myself. Somebody actually thought it essential to take money away from the paychecks of construction workers and raft guides to pay the salary of a person who does something that is completely intangible. Oh and yeah, anyone who opines of my above rant as uncalled-for, you are not allowed to utilize anything that has been manufactured with or by or through or in or above or on or about OIL. How about them apples?Jeremy YoungSnowmass Village


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