On the Trail: Stop stealing my stuff, Aspen
September 24, 2008
ASPEN ” Aspen, I’m not impressed.
The same goes for you, Carbondale.
Last week, my car was parked behind The Aspen Times when you stole all my favorite running clothes from it.
OK, I understand about the iPod. But what are you doing with my toothbrush and my smelly running shoes?
Nothing, is the answer. Ten bucks says my favorite shoes are in a Dumpster somewhere ” and now I have to go buy new ones.
The next day, someone stole my bike and my husband’s (they were locked together) from the bus stop in Carbondale.
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We were trying to reduce our carbon footprint, Aspen, we really were. But if we have to buy new bikes and tennis shoes every four months, our carbon savings could get prohibitively expensive.
It’s almost enough to make me start driving everywhere ” if I wasn’t worried you’d start siphoning gas from my vehicle.
I’ve got an idea for you, Aspen. I’ll even give it away. Just so you don’t have to steal it.
Let’s increase penalties for stealing carbon-free transportation tools. I’m thinking $10,000 per bike, skateboard or pair of running shoes, but I’ll let you decide.
Let’s take that money and create a fund to replace carbon-free transportation tools when they’re stolen. Bikes, skateboards, running shoes, skates, bus passes ” even swimsuits for people who live on one side of Ruedi Reservoir but work on another.
Basically, whatever people use to conserve gas, carbon or traffic.
I’m leaving the details to you, Aspen, since I’ve seen how you like to debate the finer points of plans in your public meetings. I know there are some tricky problems here.
Like how do we actually get the bike thieves to pay out? Or how do we distinguish between the true victims and those who just want a new bike?
But you’re smart, Aspen, I’ve noticed that about you. You can figure this out.